I have always been seen as someone who is confident. A father, husband, and brother, I have always been looked up to in my life. For a long time, things were going great. My job was awesome, my family life was great, and my sexual life was still doing well for someone my age with kids.
However, everything changed when I started suffering from ED. I felt like the lack of performance in my sexual life started to impact everything. I was less sure of myself, less confident, and eventually I felt less successful. I felt bad for not being able to please my beautiful life and wondered if I was lacking in other areas as well and had only just started to notice.
I floundered for a while, not sure what to do. I am a proud man and reaching out for help hasn’t always been my strong suit. My wife knew of my struggles but said little to me because she knew how much it was bothering me. I did not know what to do. My job started to feel more like a job, I felt more frustrated with my family easier, and my love life seemed to fade away.
I am also a very lucky man. Finally my brother noticed something was up and reached out for me to talk. We met over a beer and I spilled my heart out to him. Everything that had been bothering me, everything that was going wrong in my life. I was surprised to see that my brother seemed to understand. Turns out, he had also been through something similar. It was not as apparent as he is divorced and does not always have a sexual partner.
“Everybody gets old.” He told me. “But this is something you can control.” He told me that I needed to see a doctor and to not let this seemingly small thing run my great life into the ditch. It was not worth it.
I scheduled a doctor’s appointment with my family doctor in Sydney two weeks later. Come the day of the appointment, I felt nervous. It seemed so stupid to be nervous about this but I knew I had to go through with this despite. The visit went pretty routine, doc giving me flak about my diet and less than desired physique, the works.
Finally, the doc sat back and asked if I had any questions. Once more, I spilled about the worries I had and the lack of performance in the bedroom. He too understood. “Erectile dysfunction.” He told me. I finally had a name for what was so affecting my life.
He prescribed me some medication to pick up at the pharmacy and also gave me serious diet changes. There was not a magic cure-all for this, he told me. I had to work to get back what I had lost.
As I left the clinic and stepped out into the sweltering heat, everything clicked for me. It was not just my diet and medication that I needed to alter, I needed to change so many things in my life! I picked up the meds on the way home and reminded myself to be more patient and understanding with my family. I could not let my temper shorten.
I applied the same concepts to my work as well. I can not say that things improved right away. That only happens in movies and stories. It took some work and life changes to improve myself. I kept my brother’s words in my mind every time I felt discouraged or wanted to snap. This is something I could control.
I can say things are better now. I have learned to be a kinder, more open man. My performance has improved from the medications but I have had honest and frank conversations with my wife how to be better to her in the bedroom and that alone really improved things between us. My family life feels better than ever, the sex is great again, and my work feels much less like work now.
Erectile dysfunction was something of a blessing in disguise. It taught me to look at things differently and not let life control me. I am in control now and it is great.